Written by Adapted by Lyle H. Miller, Ph.D., and Alma Dell Smith, Ph.D.    Feb 19, 2007

Here are the stages of burnout. Especially for people with physical, emotional and mental exhaustion, unrealistically high aspirations and who are rigid perfectionists . If in the beginning your job seems perfect, the solution to all your problems, you have high hopes and expectations, and would rather work than do anything else, be wary. You're a candidate for the most insidious and tragic kind of job stress--burnout, a state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion caused by unrealistically high aspirations and illusory and impossible goals. (Image Credit ) Potential for burnout increases dramatically depending on who you are, where you work, and what your job is. If you're a hard worker who gives 110 percent, an idealistic, self-motivated achiever who thinks anything is possible if you just work hard enough, you're a possible candidate. The same is true if you're a rigid perfectionist with unrealistically high standards and expectations. In a job with little recognition and few rewards for work well done, particularly with frequent people contact or deadlines, you advance from a possible to a probable candidate. The road to burnout is paved with good intentions. There's certainly nothing wrong with being an idealistic, hardworking perfectionist or self-motivating achiever, and there's nothing wrong with having high aspirations and expectations. Indeed, these are admirable traits in our culture. Unreality is the villain. Unrealistic job aspirations and expectations are doomed to frustration and failure. The burnout candidate's personality keeps him striving with single-minded intensity until he crashes. Burnout proceeds by stages that blend and merge into one another so smoothly and imperceptibly that the victim seldom realizes what happened even after it's over. These stages include: 1. The Honeymoon During the honeymoon phase, your job is wonderful. You have boundless energy and enthusiasm and all things seem possible. You love the job and the job loves you. You believe it will satisfy all your needs and desires and solve all your problems. You're delighted with your job, your co-workers and the organization. 2. The Awakening The honeymoon wanes and the awakening stage starts with the realization that your initial expectations were unrealistic. The job isn't working out the way you thought it would. It doesn't satisfy all your needs; your co-workers and the organization are less than perfect; and rewards and recognition are scarce. As disillusionment and disappointment grow, you become confused. Something is wrong, but you can't quite put your finger on it. Typically, you work even harder to make your dreams come true. But working harder doesn't change anything and you become increasingly tired, bored, and frustrated. You question your competence and ability and start losing your self-confidence. 3. Brownout As brownout begins, your early enthusiasm and energy give way to chronic fatigue and irritability. Your eating and sleeping patterns change and you indulge in escapist behaviors such as sex, drinking, drugs, partying, or shopping binges. You become indecisive, and your productivity drops. Your work deteriorates. Co-workers and superiors may comment on it. Unless interrupted, brownout slides into its later stages. You become increasingly frustrated and angry and project the blame for your difficulties onto others. You are cynical, detached, and openly critical of the organization, superiors, and co-workers. You are beset with depression, anxiety, and physical illness. Drugs or alcohol are often a problem. 4. Full Scale Burnout Unless you wake up and interrupt the process or someone intervenes, brownout drifts remorselessly into full-scale burnout. Despair is the dominant feature of this final stage. This may take several months, but in most cases it involves three to four years. You experience an overwhelming sense of failure and a devastating loss of self-esteem and self-confidence. You become depressed and feel lonely and empty. Life seems pointless and there is a paralyzing, "what's the use" pessimism about the future. You talk about, "just quitting and getting away." Your are exhausted physically and mentally. Physical and mental breakdowns are likely. Suicide, stroke, or heart attack are not unusual as you complete the final stage of what all started with such high hopes, energy, optimism, and enthusiasm. 5. The Phoenix Phenomenon You can arise Phoenix-like from the ashes of burnout, but it takes time. First of all, you need to rest and relax. Don't take work home. If you're like most, the work won't get done and you'll only feel guilty for being "lazy." In coming back from burnout, be realistic in your job expectations, aspirations, and goals. Whomever you're talking to about your feelings can help you, but be careful. Your readjusted aspirations and goals must be yours and not somebody else's. Trying to be and do what someone else wants you to be or do is a surefire recipe for continued frustration and burnout. A final tip--create balance in your life. Invest more of yourself in family and other personal relationships, social activities, and hobbies. Spread yourself out so that your job doesn't have such an overpowering influence on your self-esteem and self-confidence. Adapted from The Stress Solution by Lyle H. Miller, Ph.D., and Alma Dell Smith, Ph.D.

        

Social Media & Marketing are key buzz words that have many people rushing to set themselves on as many social media sites as they can?! While this is great practice if you want to protect and reserve your brand name you are better off to spend your time & efforts figuring out how to contribute in a way that is fresh and relevant. Yes this has been stated many times over but there are marketing sharks (er, companies) that still have yet to harness how to get social media right and thus the average person who is stuck doing this for their company or trying to establish a personal brand is left screaming with confusion.

Currently many companies and marketing agencies suggest to clients (that's you who wonders what is all this social media stuff anyway?!) that they publish content on a predetermined interval and auto-publish it to the Facebook, Twitter, and the like. For so many reasons this is wrong. While you do want to create a blog that gives relevant content to your circle or network you must also know that you need to do more work than that to develop an online community. The Beehivebits crew has been publishing content in various outlets kept growth small but steady for over a year. Why is this, you may ask? Because there are many self professed experts out there in that online battlefield and charging high fees or dangling carrots out there and calling it "give-to-get marketing" is senseless if it's just done for the sake of marketing.

So what are your options:
1. Find a reputable Marketing technologis t that can show you examples of that to do to establish and more importantly stay current 
    **If you're struggling to understand what that is run! You need help and fast (lol!).

2. If you're more visual this video might help you take it all in. Watch this if you still don't get social media or you got "stuck" with the job of having create your company's Facebook page?! Take this to your CEO or CMO and watch their eyes light up with amazement...


3. Join all the popular networks and make a commitment to maintain the sites weekly for two months to help you understand that will creating a social media acount is often free the time commitment is demanding and results are often lengthy to realize.

4.Finally -Please realize that if you have a career, a business, or a passion about a cause that you need to participate in social media as it's hands-down the most cost effective way to get recognized & your writing trusted. Important: For a better control of your brand (this mean's you or the company you represent) you must participate in the conversation.

5. Oh and one more thing, there is a darker side to social media, if you're the message giver you don't want to pounce those who just peaked around in your community and and it you're the message receiver you want to wear your "Just looking" button for as long as possible. Here's some comments from Online community guru Chris Brogan .

If you disagree and wish to share your buzz/opinion on this comments are welcome

        

Surfing online and an article with an attention grabbing headline, which is becoming rare in this information age. This was written by an business as advice to the MLM professionals but it is truly great advice for those doing digital marketing (ie. social media or email marketing) to promote their product or service. It's truly a faux pas to overload someone that with whom you don't have a relationship with coupons and emails to promote you. Just because commerce online has allowed the door to open for digital marketing doesn't mean you should treat everyone you meet as paying customer before you even learn their first name!

How do “YOU” treat other people? Are you respectful and courteous or is it all about you? Do you treat people like you would like to be treated or are you going to be successful at “ANY COST”?

I can’t tell you how many people we come across in this industry or in life that are not respectful of others. So many times we are in a rush to get to a certain place in life that the attitude seems to be ME ME ME. Generation “X” is a perfect example of this – the I want it FAST and I want it NOW mentality. And why not? They grew up with everything at the push of a button. Can you imagine them using a rotatory phone? If some poor sap had a few “0’s” in their phone number, I bet you that they wouldn’t have any friends now days using that OLD rotatory phone. We are all in a rush these days but we need to step back and analyze how it’s impacting society.

Let take a look at the Good Ole Network Marketing industry. Technology has changed the way a lot of us do business now days. Case in point – The Internet. The internet has created an abundance of people that “ALL” want your products or services. Don’t we all wish this was the case! But it’s not and people need to learn how to use the proper techniques for approaching others.

Picture this! You have a brand new neighbor that just moves in next door. You walk over to introduce yourself. No longer than a couple of minutes go by and you start telling them about how great your business is and if they really want to be SUCCESSFUL in life, they have to join your business. First off, you know NOTHING about these people and what their dreams and aspirations are in life. You didn’t take the time to know them before you called them a LOSER and pushed your opportunity on them. This is no different than floating around social networking sites and spamming an opportunity on everyone you come across PERIOD

If you desire to be successful in your industry you need to drop the ME mentality and focus on being courteous. Using social media is only a tool and you need to be courteous and respect others in the process. Trust me, nobody gets into a person’s business only because of the opportunity. They want to first off relate with that person like a good neighbor and then in time, maybe they will join you on your path to SUCCESS!

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So who says everything needs to be serious?! Sometimes it's good to laugh and leave it to the crazy Canadians to have commercials like these...

After watching tell me what you think

        

The Gang over at Reality Rehash TV post my comments about Dancing with the Stars every week but they forgot to share this video, it's great comedy of Jimmy Fallon spoofing the train wreck that is Kate Gosselin...



Or if you're feeling brave check out the actual performance from Kate Gosselin:

Click Here to Read the entire post:

        

        

                                                                                                
Working full time and the demands of family life is stressful. If you add to that caring for an elderly family member you are a candidate for the Mother Teresa award because maintaining a kind heart, your sanity, & your job/business is tough to do.
                                                                                     

Many Seniors want to remain a part of their homes/communities as long as possible and remain fiercely independent even when it's dangerous to  do so. This could result in fatal injuries and stress on those giving care. It is very important to strike a balance between assisting with a quality of life and an overabundance of stress on caregivers which unfortunately lead to elder abuse...

In order to identify an individual’s health care needs, it is usuallya good idea to speak with his/her physician. A physician can tell youwhat level of care might be best for the individual on both a short-and long-term basis.Financial hardship often keeps people from being placed in a facility with an appropriate level of care. Contact your local Area Office of Aging for resources near you....

The questions in this guide (courtesy of www.canhr.org )  provide a framework to evaluate theeffectiveness of a person’s formal supports (In-Home SupportiveServices, case management, etc.), informal supports (family members,friends) and care needs. There is no magic formula that determines whenmore formal support services are needed or when out-of-home placementis necessary. Every individual and her/his circumstances differ.However, limited informal supports coupled with high care needs can bestrong indicators for increased use of formal community-based servicesor for investigation of out-of-home placement. This guide can be usedfor yourself or your loved one.

A. Daily Care Abilities and Need

1. How would you evaluate the individual?s abilities in the following areas?
Check all that pertain:

	Needs No Assistance	Needs Some Assistance	Needs a Lot of Assistance
Eating
Toileting
Bathing
Dressing
Grooming
Walking
Transferring

* If an individual "Needs a Lot of Assistance" in 2 or moreof the activities listed above in # 1, it is important to considerincreasing formal support services or even to consider looking intoout-of-home placement options. Professionals use these "activities ofdaily living" (ADLs) to determine appropriateness for a variety ofservices and for triggering insurance payments for care at home or ininstitutions.

2. How would you evaluate the individual’s abilities in the following areas?
Check all that pertain:

	Needs No Assistance	Needs Some Assistance	Needs a Lot of Assistance
Preparing Meals
Shopping
Transportation
Housekeeping
Preparing Medication
Taking Medication
Bill Paying
Using Telephone

*If an individual "Needs a Lot of Assistance" in 2 or moreof the activities listed above in #2, it is important to considerincreasing informal or formal support services. Professionals use these"instrumental activities of daily living" (IADLs) to determineappropriateness for a variety of services.

3. How would you answer the following questions about special care needs?

Is the individual incontinent in bladder?

Yes

No

Is the individual incontinent in bowel?

Yes

No

Does the individual wander off?

Yes

No

Does the individual stay awake during the night?

Yes

No

Does the individual show combative behaviors, (e.g., shouting, hitting)?

Yes

No

Does the individual require tube feeding?

Yes

No

Does the individual require skin care treatment for an advanced stage bed sore?

Yes

No

Does the individual require frequent assistance in transferring to prevent falls, e.g., going from the bed to the wheelchair?

Yes

No

*If you checked "yes" for any of the questions above in #3,you may need to increase formal support services. Start investigatingout-of-home placement options.

B. Informal (Family) Support Services

The ability of someone to remain at home often depends on theavailability, quantity and quality of one’s informal supports, (e.g.,services like personal care, shopping, housekeeping, cooking, etc.provided by spouse, family and friends). It also depends on the healthand willingness of the primary informal caregiver to continue toprovide care.

1. Is there someone who either acts or can act as an informal caregiver for the individual?

   Yes

   No

2. If there is an informal caregiver available, does he/she live within 45 minutes of the individual?

   Yes

   No

3. Could the primary support person provide at least 20-30 hours of care each week?

   Yes

   No

4. Taking the primary support person’s own health and physical abilityinto consideration, would you consider him/her able to meet theindividual’s care needs on a daily basis?

   Yes

   No

5. Taking the caregiver’s personal life (e.g., family, job, etc.) intoconsideration, would you consider him/her to be willing to provide thecare that the individual needs on a daily basis?

   Yes

   No

*If you are unable to comfortably answer "yes" to thesequestions, you may want to consider looking into formal community-basedoptions to provide the assistance and services that the informalcaregiver cannot provide.

C. Formal (Agency Provided) Community-Based Services

The use of appropriate formal services (e.g., respite care, In-HomeSupportive Services, case management, etc.) can be crucial formaintaining community independence and providing needed backup andrelief to the informal, family support system. Refer to the fact sheetentitled "Community-Based Services for Seniors" for a list of some ofthe formal support services you can access.

If the individual already receives community-based services, it isimportant to evaluate the effectiveness of the combined formal andinformal services in meeting the individual’s needs. If the combinationhas limited effectiveness in meeting the individual’s needs, you maywant to consider accessing different or additional community-basedservices. You may also want to speak with your informal caregiver todiscuss how the help he/she provides can better complement the formalsupport services you receive.

List any services that you believe the individual needs but is not receiving from the formal or informal support systems:

______________________________________

______________________________________

______________________________________

______________________________________

______________________________________

D. Out-of-Home Placement

The individual’s answers to questions #1 and #3 will help gauge whattype of facility is most appropriate to meet his/her needs. It willalso influence the facility’s decision to accept the individual, and itwill definitely impact the amount of monthly payments to the facility.If you are unsure about the care needs of the individual, it is a goodidea to speak with his/her physician, and perhaps a geriatric carecoordinator, to find out what level of care would be most appropriate.

The following are types of residences/facilities that may be able toprovide the level of care and supervision that the individual needs:

Senior Housing or Retirement Communities: Residentsmust usually be independent. These residences provide only room, lighthousekeeping, a meal plan, some social activities and scheduled tripsfor shopping and doctors appointments. Individuals needing even "someassistance" in activities of daily living as indicated in #1 might notbe appropriate for this type of setting.

Residential Care Facilities for the Elderly (RCFEs):Often called assisted living or board and care homes, RCFEs arenon-medical facilities that offer room, board and daily assistance withdressing, eating, personal hygiene, health maintenance, transportationand assistance with prescribed medication. RCFEs provide a level ofcare that is appropriate for people who are unable to live bythemselves but do not need the extent of medical care provided by anursing facility. Medi-Care does not pay for care in RCFEs, and theaverage monthly cost for RCFEs in California is about $3,000 per month.

Note: Residential care facilities might accept individualswho "need a lot of assistance" with activities of daily living (#1) butbecome more hesitant to accept persons who answer "yes" to questions in#3, Special Care Needs.

Nursing Facilities: These facilities provide carefor residents who need 24-hour nursing care and are dependent on othersfor assistance with most activities of daily living. Skilled nursingfacilities often provide rehabilitative care for residents aftermedical procedures. Residents who are Medi-Cal eligible can useMedi-Cal to pay for nursing facilities that are Medi-Cal certified.

E. Next Steps

There are a number of factors involved in planning for care andsupport at home or long term care in a facility. These include theindividual’s healthcare needs, financial considerations, mentalcapacity and legal considerations.

        

Part 2 of an Ongoing series about stress:

Stress is a part of our lives and there’s no getting around it. But as much as we all live with it, many of us misunderstand some of the basics about stress and its role in our lives. Why does this matter? Stress has been indicted in many research studies in exacerbating very real physical illnesses — everything from heart disease to Alzheimer’s disease. Reducing stress can not only help you feel better, but also live a longer, disease-free life.

Let’s look at some of the common myths surrounding stress.

Myth 1: Stress is the same for everybody.

Stress is not the same for everybody, nor does everyone experience stress in the same way. Stress is different for each and every one of us. What is stressful for one person may or may not be stressful for another; each of us responds to stress in an entirely different way.

For instance, some people may get stressed out paying the monthly bills every month, while for others such a task isn’t stressful at all. Some get stressed out by high pressure at work, while others may thrive on it.

Myth 2: Stress is always bad for you.

According to this view, zero stress makes us happy and healthy. But this is wrong — stress is to the human condition what tension is to the violin string: too little and the music is dull and raspy; too much and the music is shrill or the string snaps.

Stress in and of itself is not bad (especially in small amounts). So while stress can be the kiss of death or the spice of life, the key is to understand how best to manage it. Managing stress makes us productive and happy, while mismanaging it may hurt us and cause us to fail or become even more stressed.

Myth 3: Stress is everywhere, so you can’t do anything about it.

So is the possibility of getting into an automobile accident everytime we get into our cars, but we don’t allow that to stop us from driving.

You can plan your life so that stress does not overwhelm you. Effective planning involves setting priorities and working on simple problems first, solving them, and then going on to more complex difficulties.

When stress is mismanaged, it’s difficult to prioritize. All your problems seem to be equal and stress seems to be everywhere.

Myth 4: The most popular techniques for reducing stress are the best ones.

No universally effective stress reduction techniques exist (although many magazine articles and pop psychology articles claim to know them!).

We are all different — our lives are different, our situations are different, and our reactions are different. A comprehensive stress management program tailored to the individual works best. But self-help books that can teach you many of the successful stress management techniques can also be of great help, as long as you stick to the program and practice the techniques daily.

Myth 5: No symptoms, no stress.

An absence of symptoms does not mean the absence of stress. In fact, camouflaging symptoms with medication may deprive you of the signals you need for reducing the strain on your physiological and psychological systems.

Many of us experience symptoms of stress in a very physical way, even though stress is a psychological effect. Feeling anxious, shortness of breath, or simply feeling run down all the time can all be physical signs of stress. Feeling overwhelmed, disorganized and having difficulty concentrating are common mental signs of stress.

Myth 6: Only major symptoms of stress require attention.

This myth assumes that the “minor” symptoms, such as headaches or stomach acid, may be safely ignored. Minor symptoms of stress are the early warnings that your life is getting out of hand and that you need to do a better job of managing stress.

If you wait until you start feeling the “major” symptoms of stress (such as a heart attack), it may be too late. Those early warning signs are best listened to earlier rather than later. A change in lifestyle (such as exercising more) to deal with those early warning signs will be far less costly (in time and economics) than dealing with the effects of not listening to them.

 

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This is part 1 of an ongoing series we’d like to share about stress, especially in the workplace. Feel Free to leave your comments questions …
Jobs and careers are an important part of our lives. Along with providing a source of income, they help us fulfill our personal aims, build social networks, and serve our professions or communities. They are also a major source of emotional stress.

Stress at work

Even “dream jobs” have stressful deadlines, performance expectations, and other responsibilities. For some, stress is the motivator that ensures things get done. However, workplace stress can easily overwhelm your life. You may continually worry about a particular project, feel unfairly treated by a supervisor or co-workers, or knowingly accept more than you can handle in hopes of earning a promotion. Putting your job ahead of everything else can also affect your personal relationships, compounding the work-related pressures.

Layoffs, restructuring, or management changes can heighten anxiety about your job security. In fact, a Norwegian study showed that the mere rumor of a factory’s closure caused rapid increases in workers’ pulse and blood pressure. Research in the U.S. has found that workplace injuries and accidents tend to increase in organizations that are being downsized.

The body reacts to stress

Along with its emotional toll, prolonged job-related stress can drastically affect your physical health. Constant preoccupation with job responsibilities often leads to erratic eating habits and not enough exercise, resulting in weight problems, high blood pressure, and elevated cholesterol levels.

Common job stressors such as perceived low rewards, a hostile work environment, and long hours can also accelerate the onset of heart disease, including the likelihood of heart attacks.
This is particularly true for blue-collar and manual workers. Studies suggest that because these employees tend to have little control over their work environments, they are more likely to develop cardiovascular disease than those in traditional “white collar” jobs.

Your age is also a factor. A University of Utah study found that as stressed workers get older, their blood pressure increases above normal levels. Interestingly, many of the study’s over-60 workers reported that they did not feel upset or unduly pressured by their jobs, even though their blood pressure levels were significantly
higher.

Job stress also frequently causes burnout, a condition marked by emotional exhaustion and negative or cynical attitudes toward others and yourself.

Burnout can lead to depression, which, in turn, has been linked to a variety of other health concerns such as heart disease and stroke, obesity and eating disorders, diabetes, and some forms of cancer. Chronic depression also reduces your immunity to other types of illnesses, and can even contribute to premature death.

What you can do to combat job stress

Fortunately, there are many ways to help manage job-related stress. Some programs blend relaxation techniques with nutrition and exercise. Others focus on specific issues such as time management, assertiveness training, and improving social skills.

A qualified psychologist or other mental health professional can help you pinpoint the causes of your stress, and develop appropriate coping strategies.

Here are some other tips for dealing with stress on the job:

• Make the most of workday breaks.
• Even 10 minutes of “personal time” will refresh your mental outlook. Take a brief walk, chat with a co-worker about a non-job topic, or simply sit quietly with your eyes closed and breathe.
• If you feel angry, walk away.Mentally regroup by counting to 10, then look at the situation again. Walking and other physical activities will also help you work off steam.
• Set reasonable standards for yourself and others. Don’t expect perfection.
• Talk to your employer about your job description. Your responsibilities and performance criteria may not accurately reflect what you are doing.

Working together to make needed changes will not only benefit your emotional and physical health, but also improve the organization’s overall productivity.

 

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(image source)

Part 1: Stop the Insanity

1) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
2) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after you boss does. This is especially effective if your boss is a different gender.
3) Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Cha-cha."
4) Send e-mail to the rest of the company telling them exactly what you're doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."
5) Hi-Lite your shoes. Tell people you haven't lost them as much since you did this.
6) While sitting at your desk, soak your fingers in Palmolive liquid. Call everyone Madge.
7) Hang mosquito netting around your cubicle. When you emerge to get coffee or a printout or whatever, slap yourself randomly the whole way.
8) Put a chair facing a printer. Sit there all day and tell people you're waiting for your document.
9) Every time someone asks you to do something, anything, ask them if they want fries with that.
10) Send e-mail back and forth to yourself engaging yourself in an intellectual debate. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.
11) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair-dancing.
12) Put your trash can on your desk. Label it "IN."
13) Feign an unnatural and hysterical fear of staplers.
14) Send e-mail messages saying there's free pizza or donuts or cake in the lunch room. When people drift back to work complaining that they found none, lean back, pat your stomach and say, "Oh you've got to be faster than that."
15) Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has withdrawn from caffeine addiction, switch to espresso.

 

Part 2: Prison vs Work

N PRISON...you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.
      AT WORK ... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.
      IN PRISON...you get three meals a day.
      AT WORK...you only get a break for one meal and you pay for it.
      IN PRISON...you get time off for good behavior
      AT WORK...you get more work for good behavior
      IN PRISON...the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
      AT WORK...you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself.
      IN PRISON...you can watch TV and play games.
      AT WORK...you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
      IN PRISON...you get your own toilet.
      AT WORK...you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat.
      IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit.
      AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family.
      IN PRISON...the taxpayers pay all expenses with no work required.
      AT WORK...you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.
      IN PRISON...you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.
      AT WORK...you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.
      IN PRISON...you must deal with sadistic wardens.
      AT WORK...they are called managers.

 

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